I have to share this story. Be forewarned. This is not a story with a moral, a point, or really any socially-redeeming qualities.
It’s just entertaining as heck.
Yes. A car covered with images of the band KISS. Flames lickedup the trunk behind the logo. Black and white faces graced the sides, with the corresponding band member names above them. A KISS CAR. At Shoney’s.
Well, it just so happens that my friend Jeff, a UPS pilot, is also a huge KISS fan. Like “dresses up as Ace Frehley every year for Halloween” fan of the band. So I walked around the car to better describe it later to my friend. I had assumed it was a custom paint job. Wrong. It was an auto-wrap.
Right. Some guy paid a professional sign company to auto-wrap his car. With KISS. Okay.
So I walked into the restaurant, and went into the ladies room to throw away some trash from the car. As I’m coming out of the ladies room, I pass a guy and hear him say to me something along the lines of “Wow, you look really good!” With enthusiasm.
I was dressed nicely, if conservatively, in a black dress and short heels. And there really wasn’t anyone else in the hallway. So I turned my head to see if he was talking to me.
“I’d love to take you for a ride in my KISS car.”
ME: “Um. No thanks. I’m good.”
HIM: “I saw you checking it out.”
ME: “Um… nope. I’m good. Thanks.” (Mentally: Must. get. away. from. crazy. KISS car guy!)
So I bolted for the table with my colleagues.
Okay, let’s break this down. First, who on earth goes trolling to pick up women at a Shoney’s? At lunch?
Second, “I’d love to give you a ride in my KISS car?” Really? Seriously? That’s your standard pickup line? Does that work often?
I swear, some days, it’s like I’m a magnet, and weird people and situations are iron filings.
(ETA: Thanks to my boss, @joemazing I have been able to add actual photos of the KISS car. And I only just now realized that “Love Gun” is also emblazoned on the hood, which sort of completes the story. You’re welcome.)