1. daryn

    Great question. My life is NOWHERE in the same zip code as where I thought it’d be in some
    aspects, but just like I’d hoped it’d be in others. The best parts (at least I think so) are the ones
    that I did not predict.


  2. ·

    The best parts (at least I think so) are the ones that I did not predict

    That is an awesome comment, D. Do you feel like those unpredictable parts are more things God brought into your life unexpectedly, more choices you made that broke your preconceptions about who you are, or a mix of both?

    I find this whole line of thought really interesting. Because for me, I agree, the total left-field stuff is probably the best stuff. Some of those things are where God surprised me, and others are where I surprised myself (and just about everyone else!)


  3. bartlett

    After lo these many years of naval gazing, I’ve come to the conclusion that, as Rice said, life isn’t set but it’s predictable. After all, we recognize a series of actions can create a predictable reaction, so to think otherwise of life in general is inconsistent with nature. For example, if I chop at a tree with an ax in a way consistent with felling trees in the past, chances are, it’s gonna fall. Yeah, it may not. It may fall the wrong direction. it could even get up and walk away. If those things happen, they are, like life, the odd little occurrances that simply happen. But 99 out 100 times, that tree’s gonna fall as predicted.

    My point: My life turned out exactly as predicted. And there’s the rub. You may remember the comment from our previous incarnations as forum squatters, passed to me by someone who shouldn’t have been in my life but who did have one pearl of wisdom: Use your powers for good, not evil. As a true comic fan, a four and a practicioner of all things soul improving, I’m betting you grasp the concept of self-fulfilling prophecy. And so, my prophecies came true, if only because I made sure to cut the tree in just the right way. Unfortunately, in many, many cases, they were bad prophecies brought on by a series of long, slow tangos with lesser demons and flawed angels.

    I do not believe we are predestined for anything. I think we are born with skills, talents and penchants. We are culturized, socialized and civilized to act, think and behave in ways consistent with those around us. And we are set loose on the world to find our way. We bump, we roll, we stumble and we find our way.

    I disagree with the thought that we don’t use free will. Yes, we do. Every day we make choices based on the information we have, the experiences we’ve been through and our relative comfort level. The person who wakes up and makes coffee before watching Oprah is no different than the person who cures cancer, solves global warming or figures out what’s going on with Britney Spears (see how I manage to keep Britney relevant in our ongoing conversations?). They both exercise free will, just with different desires, impact and conclusion. I don’t think we can judge a person’s use of free will by the amount of societal change they cause. I disagree with the statement because I don’t know that everyone is rolling around in ruts. In fact, I think most of us want to enjoy the life we have, even if the intellectual elite and mediahos think it’s living in a rut, “red state compulsion” or being a “tweener.” It is, in fact, an exercise in free will to write this note, read this blog, do the crosswords or dance a jig in women’s underwear. These things matter to whomever does them because, well, they are satisfied with the level of achievement. (And the whole “things I do matters” thing I’d love to discuss, but don’t want to make this too long.)

    God? Yes. But like a parent, He/She does not control or dictate. Instead, we get that whole free will thing, a set of parameters to act in, and — I believe — occassional intervention. Like getting smacked in the head with a figurative 2X4, or tripping over an internet forum filled with spazzes, geeks and dorks who turn on a whole bank of enlightenment bulbs, or watching a kid do something so spectacular it makes me think the world is, indeed, worth the grief.

    Um… a long answer to a short question. Then again, haven’t posted much lately so thought I’d get caught up! Lol…


  4. ·

    I’d love to discuss, but don’t want to make this too long.

    Hey, thanks for the restraint. *snicker*

    As far as the ruts thing, I don’t really tie “ruts” to “red state compulsion” or societal expectations. More personal, or maybe familial expectations. If your parents are circus freaks, from a long line of circus freaks, then being a circus freak could constitute a “rut” for you.

  5. bartlett

    You have no idea the restraint involved! You start dragging out your kharmic chameleons for our casual consideration (yeah, dig on THAT illiteration), you’re going to get response, Chorus-style. Rock that post! lol…

    BTW, what are you going to do when you’ve resolved your existential angst, satiatied your Sartre appetite and generally come to peace with your chunk of the universe and your place within?


  6. ·

    It’s “alliteration.” “Illiteration,” I suppose, would be the act of demonstrating you’re illiterate.

    And to answer your question, “I’m going to Disneyland.”

  7. daryn

    Do you feel like those unpredictable parts are more things God brought into your life unexpectedly, more choices you made that broke your preconceptions about who you are, or a mix of both?

    Probably the combo package for me. God definately surprised me with the answer to my (and a whole lotta other people’s) prayers. But it took his leading, as well as some nice neon sign road markers along the way to get my hard head to see where he was taking us. We were guided into a decision that was not “traditional” – the way that we thought that things were “supposed to be.” Who would have ever thunk it?


  8. ·

    I suspected that would be the case.

    And FWIW, I often think that if we could get a transdimensional “peek” at what would have happened if what was “supposed to be” had occurred, we would probably find that we got the better of the two. 😉

  9. Myself

    Dear Kat,

    I was feeling alone and I thought about maybe trying to find some of my old friends on the internet. I thought about your old blog and on a whim put that into google and found this place. I was hoping to find people and be able to email them, that was my intention, but not anymore.

    Don’t worry, I am not trying to bother you, matter of fact after this comment, I plan on never having anything to do with the people from MB ever again. No posts, no emails, no comments on blogs, nothing. I just felt the need to comment on some of the things that were said, then, I am out of here, gone forever and no one will ever hear from me again. I hope thats OK, I am not trying to intrude.

    You know, I don’t know if “bartlet” meant me as the poster that should not have ever been in his life, or not, but honestly, he is right. I offered friendship, pure and simple, nothing else, with no other ill or twisted intentions. If that was misread, then someone gave themselves way too much credit… ROFLMAO!

    Sorry, I don’t mean to be mean about it, but that’s just plain funny to me. I don’t know if that’s what happened, but it was all I could come up with as to the why’s. Trust me when I say, he never had anything to worry about to do with me, never has, never will. I will say this, he also never has to worry about me wanting to be his friend again. That ship has sailed, was lost at sea, and sunk. I don’t want to be friends with a person who would act like that.

    You both know me better than that. I would think that after all of the years people have known me, they would know better than that.

    I will say I was extremely hurt by what happened. I don’t want your pity, and it really don’t matter anymore, its just after all of the painful stuff I have been through the last several years, I did not need anything else dumped on me. It hurts when people who you consider friends treat you that way. No matter, I am kind of glad it happened. Now I know the truth and how people really thought of me.

    Good luck with your life,


  10. ·

    Hopes: I’m reasonably sure Bartlett was referring to the person who was the original reason he was at that particular forum.

    As for my own reasons for not even reading that forum anymore, for nearly a year now, they are my own reasons–but those reasons had nothing to do with you, and everything to do with the fact that the place as a whole became an unhealthy place for me to be, as you’ve noted for yourself at various times.

    At that time, the last email I had from you indicated that you were doing much the same, and abandoning that particular email address. I hoped it was an indication that things were getting better for you.

  11. Myself


    Things are fine with me, never better actually, next month ends the year long legal mess with the trust fund, then things will be very fine indeed. I am not going to say how fine, but pretty darn fine.

    Its funny, I never knew that thing existed, neither of us did, but the Lord wanted us to have it, so it (the trust fund) found us. Its always good when a bank calls you out of the blue and wants to give you lots of money lol.

    I was just lonely and thought I would look you up. Dont worry I am not going to hang around, I dont want to intrude. Plus, I have lots of friends now, Christian folks, they are good people. They like me.

    Plus, I dont want to bother bartlet or anyone, so I really do have to go.

    Take it easy and God bless,



  12. ·

    I’m glad to hear about the trust fund (you deserve it!), but gladder still to hear about the friends–which are more valuable.

    I want you to know you’re welcome here, Hopes–but also that I understand if putting bad things behind you necessitates moving on. 🙂

    God bless, and take care!

  13. Myself


    Thanks for making me feel welcome. I do feel blessed to have friends, and I count you among them. As for the trust fund, I am glad we are getting it too. Heck I might buy new tires for my mobile home now hehehe. Actually I don’t know what we are going to do with it, except I know we are going to pay off our land.

    Anyway I got to thinking about your original question here and felt a strong pull to answer it. Its something I have learned quite a bit about over the last year ago. Your question was about predestination if I am reading it right.

    I believe the answer to that question is yes, no, and both. I will do my best to explain, but this might be a long winded answer. It involves lots of theology and doctrine and is a bit complicated but I will do my best.

    Don’t worry I am not trying to convert you to the Reformed faith or anything lol. Anyway, about predestination, here is a verse and a place to start. Its in Ephesians

    Eph 1:4 just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him. In love

    Eph 1:5 He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will,

    Heres one in Romans

    Rom 8:29 For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined {to become} conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren;
    Rom 8:30 and these whom He predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified.

    So the answer to the question of are we predestined is yes. If we are Christians, we were predestined to be adopted as sons or daughters before he created the foundations of the world, which totally blows my mind lol. It’s a hard concept to grasp, but its true.

    Now the question of free will. This is a tough one because in my faith we believe in T.U.L.I.P (doctrine) but I will do the best I can without making this 17 pages. If you would like to know what TULIP is, here’s a link to a really good theologian that can explain it much better than I can. He is so intelligent that it sometimes blows my mind. After listening to his show, The Aseity of God, I was in awe for about 2 days. You might not find that show on his website, it was during one of his confrence series, I think last years confrence series.

    Yes we do have free will in some areas, we have the free will to sin and mess up our lives. We have free will to live outside the will of God but usually that usually turns out bad. I wont go into what is the will of God or this will turn into a book, unless you want me to. That’s a whole nuther topic.

    How does this relate to relationship, marriage and such. Well, this is the long and short of it. If we live in the bounds of the will of God, and follow His laws (the best we can) then our wants and needs will likely be godly wants and needs.

    Kind of like this, if we live how God tells us to live our lives then we will naturally have wants, and needs that reflect the way we live. For an example. Should “Tim and Ruth” (fictional people) get married, are they right for each other? Is he the one? Well, if Tim and Ruth are living godly lives trying their best to live like God intended, then sure, why not, because their wants and needs are likely to be godly wants and needs.

    Its when we introduce sin into the equation that just messes everything up. If we are living outside the will of God, not following his laws, etc. then we cant possibly know if we are making correct decisions or if its Gods will, because we are not living inside Gods will to begin with. Its kind of hard to explain, its about a years worth of theology and doctrine crammed down into a few paragraphs. I hope it makes some sense, I know I am not the best at explaining things.

    On another note, I found this Christian apologist that I just love to listen to. He is an apologist but also talks a lot about philosophy, world views, and such, and is very intelligent. When I first started listening to him I thought this guy would be perfect for you, I think you would like him. I will warn you in advance, if you do go listen to him, get your track shoes on, and a quiet undisturbed place. He goes over concepts very fast and I sometimes have to listen to the things he says a couple of times before it sinks in. You might have an easier time, you are smarter than I am.

    His ministry is called “Let my people think” and man will you ever learn to think. That guy has rearranged the furniture in my head more than once lol. Don’t take that the wrong way, I don’t mean you don’t think, I just thought as intelligent as you are you would really get into this guy. He uses lots of big words and the concepts he covers are things that cover deep thought. Just the kind of thing 4s like. Oh and he don’t really cover doctrine so there should not be any conflicts with your faith and listening to him. He is good for all Christians, no matter what Church.

    If you would like to listen to him, heres a link. http://www.rzim.org/radio/archives.php

    I did the one Understanding the Spirit of the Age, its really good. You should take a listen, I think you would really like this guy.



  14. ·

    Thanks for the links and the thoughts–a lot to chew on, as you said. Lately, my poor brain has been taxed just getting through the workday!

    I had to free your comment from my rather aggressive spam filter (it likes to eat harmless comments!)

  15. Myself


    My brain has gotten quite the work out over the last year or so too. I have been really deep in study and figuring out lots of things. Mostly stuff like Theology and figuring out how everything in life fits together.

    I only wish I had more time, which is really becomming an issue so I doubt I can come around here very often so dont take offense if I dont show up but every blue moon.

    I dont know if it hit you or not but we had this severe ice storm a few months back, the worst one in 75 years or so. It did a ton of damage to my woods, it literly looks like a hurricane hit it. It ripped the whole tops out of trees and snapped some of them in half.

    It also, unfortunatly, crushed my shed so I have that project, I have to replace most of the roof as the tree limb went straight through it.

    I have to remove, I dont know how many trees, and replant or my beautiful woods will look like a war zone. Its a big job, I have somewhere between 1 to 2 acers of woods, lots of trees and mess to clean up. I did get the ones out of the yard but thats not even a drop in the bucket compared to this mess. See, I was right to buy that chain saw lol.

    I also have lots of other stuff that is pressing, I never have any time these days and it only will get worse with the warm weather. Soon I will be extra busy. Then there is my studies, I want to do more and start reading the dead guys like Spurgeon and Pink, but my time is so limited these days I can barely keep up with the stuff I am doing. So most of my studies are done until the wee hours of the night. I was up till midnight last night listening to this series on the Theology of Marriage, what marriage means to God. It was interesting stuff, stuff I never thought about before.

    Anyway take care, if I get a chance I will stop by but who knows when that will be.

    If you ever want to email or anything I think my email address is on these comments. I had to type it in to post a comment so I assume you have it.

    Anyway I gotta go, take care,


  16. Myself


    Sorry to post again but I did some thinking and I decided not to post to your blog. Its nothing personal against you, its just, how do I put this, in the past I have had trouble with certain people, I think you understand what I am saying.

    I guess what I am trying to say is I would rather not have my life, experiences, or thoughts, up on display for some certain people to see. Not you of course, just some people who I dont trust and would rather not be around anymore.

    I only want people who I can trust in my life, people who really are my friends, I have had too much trouble with people who claim they are my friends only to find out later they never were. Life is too short for stuff like that you know?

    Hopefully you can understand and it is not too offensive. I am trying to say it in the nicest way I can to avoid conflict and drama, who needs that stuff lol.

    If you want to email me you can, dont feel obligated, otherwise I am just going to get out of here, I think it is for the best.

    Good luck and take care


  17. ·

    Hopes – No worries, girlfriend. You’re making the choice you feel is best, nothing wrong with that and all things considered, pretty understandable. I’m glad to hear that you have a real-world circle of friends, and that’s a good place to focus your energy. Which can definitely be in short supply when you’re a hard working mom! Take good care of yourself.

  18. Myself


    I am going to concentrate on my friends in my real life although, I do have to say, I have to fight myself to want to be or stay in the friendships with them. Its almost easier for me to just not be friends with anyone, because I fear being dragged through the mud and hurt once again. Anymore, I don’t really look to people for much of anything, I look to a higher power. If people want to be friends with me then fine, if not, then I don’t let it bother me.

    I did decided what I want to do with the Trust Fund though, I think I want to buy out my neighbors and plant an orchard where they live. Especially the rootin’ tootin’ shootin’ one. I know I am supposed to love my neighbors but I have the hardest time with that commandment. I also want to do something lasting with it, like help out the Church.

    You know, I did think of something that I wanted to say, you can post it if you want, or not, but its something I wanted to tell you, its something I thought about over the weekend.

    When people see you they see you through their own perceptions. They see you through their own experiences, and though whatever is going on with them in their lives. I think back about two misunderstandings that happened in which I was painted in the wrong colors. One, as you are aware happened on Reunion where I was labeled as some thing that I am not. That person saw me though what they had going on in their life. Their own fears played a big role as to how they saw me. They, over religious concerns, labeled me as something that I am not. Their own fears drove that train, and also altered the way the perceived me.

    The other was a misunderstanding. Yes, that whole “Chucky” thing which was pretty stupid. Assumptions also can get people into more trouble. I assumed if someone was talking about football then they must know something about football. When I was talking about “Chucky” I assumed that person knew who John Gruden was and that “Chucky” was his nick name. So when I said I just love Chucky, I meant John Gruden, because he is my favorite football coach.

    He is called Chucky because of the weird faces he makes, he looks like that doll Chucky who they made all the horror movies about. His fans even carry Chucky dolls to his games, everyone knows his nick name is Chucky, it’s a pretty well known thing. Now that person who obviously did not know a thing about football took what I said totally wrong and assumed I was saying something that I was not. I had to explain to them what I was saying because that person had the wrong assumptions. I had the wrong assumptions too, as I thought they knew something about the subject that they were talking about.

    Miscommunication and text. OK I will admit, I am not a writer, and not even good at writing, so I probably say things that come across wrong. Its very hard for me to express what I am thinking in text. I am not very good with words and it has always been a struggle for me to express myself in writing. Just ask my high school English teachers, I suck at writing. I barely pulled a D in those classes. An art class, I can get straight As and the teachers loved me, I was the prima donna and could do whatever I wanted in those classes. In English, I just hoped I would pass, and barely did pass. Anyway, I guess what I am trying to say is sometimes, especially in text, I think I am misunderstood and I think that’s maybe what happened to me again. I will say I am sorry for any misunderstanding, I hope whatever it was, it was not too bad.

    Lastly, I mentioned that people know me, or should know me better than that, in that other post. Kat, I am pretty direct in everything. I don’t beat around the bush about much of nothing, I am as blunt and direct as they come. I just ask that if I was misunderstood, if something I said was taken in some weird way, that you, and others, would look at the way I am, and think about it for a few minutes. I am not the type of person who would hint around about anything. If I had something to say, I would just say it. That’s pretty much who I am.

    Anyway I am going to get out of here now, I hope you have a good life, take care.



Leave a Reply