Hello again, strangers.
I’ve spent this past week on vacation. I’d been planning, in a very nebulous, not-very-much-like-an-actual-plan way, to take a vacation at some point in August near my anniversary.
Which was yesterday, so thank you for the lovely thoughts and wishes.
But at any rate, my vacation plan was less a plan and more like a neon sign in the bad part of town, sputtering and sizzling in the drizzly noir rain an intermittent warning message along the lines of “Get out. Now.”
It had been well over a year (and at least two job changes) since my last vacation. As exciting as it was to go to Comic Con for work, “exciting” and “work” were not two things my body and soul needed more of at that point. The year has been pretty full of both “exciting” and “work” so far.
When I had an anxiety attack, I knew it was way past time to take a break and let my body, mind and soul rest and recuperate a little. So I put in all the official forms and emailed all the people and Googled till I found an actual, out-of-town getaway we could afford.
Chris was able to get three days off to go with me to a cabin in the hills near Madison, Indiana. It was wonderful. Quiet, peaceful, beautiful. Three things I actually did need more of at the time. I didn’t bring a laptop or any kind of computer. There was no wi-fi. Even cellular service was limited. Unplugging to that extent was a nerve-wracking relief. I did receive one work-related voicemail, from someone who probably didn’t know I was on vacation.
At one point, I kept saying, to myself much more than to Chris, “I don’t have a laptop. I don’t have internet. Whatever they need, I can’t help them right now anyway.”
Right now is Sunday. I feel a little like a bag that has been shaken out upside down. I feel like a good starting place. I feel a little disoriented.
I feel like the day before the first day of a new school year. Excited and a little scared and crackling with the stored energy of summer.
How are you?