ONCE: And the jealous games people play

So, it looks like it’s time for another quick recap of Once Upon a Time.

First of all, I would like to say I totally called it. When they first introduced the character of the Wicked Witch/Zelena, I predicted envy was going to be her defining trait, and her green skin color was going to figure at least symbolically into that. Well, leave it to the writers of Once  to again take an idea that works just fine as a metaphor and make it completely literal.  (See also: Dad with a Peter Pan complex from the first half of the season.)

I admit I was a little dubious about Zelena’s parentage up until this episode. She could have used the blood her flying accomplice snagged from Regina to open Cora’s tomb. I mean, how many random characters can they expect viewers to believe are related to each other on one show?

Evidently, all of them.

According to the results of Rumpel’s magical Maury Povich DNA testing, Cora is indeed Zelena’s mom. The jury is still out as to whether the Golden One is her father, as the fandom is rampantly speculating, but I personally doubt it considering the comments he made about family to her in Storybrooke.

Not to mention, it would’ve required Cora to conceal a pregnancy and childbirth from not only Rumpel after she’d gotten his attention, but also the Prince she was engaged and married to at the time.  Actually, Prince Henry has been firmly established as an oblivious dolt, but once Rumpel was on the hunt for Cora’s firstborn, I think it’s unlikely she could’ve slipped a kid, much less his own progeny, past his enchanted radar.

So Zelena’s backstory was revealed just in time for her showdown with her little sister Regina. It turns out, it’s not easy being green, but it’s even harder when you’re abandoned and unwanted by everyone in your life.

If you didn’t predict Zelena was going to try to rip out Regina’s heart after swiping Charming’s courage and Gold’s brain, I’m confiscating your cheesy fairground crystal ball. If you thought Regina would be dumb enough to not remove her heart for safekeeping, what show have you been watching for three seasons? Their “shocking battle” was not all that shocking. Still, it was nice to get confirmation that our villain’s motivation is indeed extreme jealousy.

However, it was delightful seeing Regina open up a bit to Robin, even going so far as to give him her heart. Again, in the glaringly literal sense, but it looks like she might eventually consider doing it figuratively at some point.

Other Thoughts: I like Hook a lot, at least as a worthy foil for Emma, but his scenes with Henry were even more painfully awkward than everyone else’s scenes with Henry. Which is a high bar to clear.  Maybe I just think a grown man showing a teenage boy his sextant sounds vaguely inappropriate.

Maybe it’s just me, but I thought the Wizard had some nice-looking CGI digs in Oz. Also, it was reassuring to see that even if Emma nearly married a flying monkey, at least he was a flying monkey who used to be a pretty decent con artist.

Aside for those who are wondering why his name was Walsh, and not Oscar Diggs or Professor Marvel: Professor Marvel is off limits for the same reason the Witch’s shoes were silver, not ruby. While the Oz books are in the public domain, anything specific to the 1939 movie still belongs to MGM.  Oscar, the character’s name from the books, was just used in last year’s Oz the Great and Powerful. The name “Walsh” is most likely a nod to actor Pat Walshe, who played the chief of the winged monkeys in the 1939 film.

So what do you think, campers? Is the feud between Wicked and Evil shaping up like you’d hoped, or are you disappointed with this stretch of episodes so far?

Leave a Reply